Lately I have been struggling - far more than I would ever admit to anyone to be truthful. This is not a sympathy seeking attempt - heaven knows I cant stand it. This is about re-evaluating and needing to find a way to get back to the core joys, gratitude and inner-peace I desperately need.
When I started this blog
, about 13 months ago now it was with the intention of creating a space that only focussed on the good stuff, however small they may be, in each day. As time went on I gradually moved away from the daily check-in and concious focus on the little happy things.
Now I find myself feeling sad, low and tired. I need to pick myself up and stop looking to the world and people around me for a feeling of belonging, friendship, or importance. I give my heart and soul to those around me. That wont ever change. But I cant say it doesn't hurt when on a daily basis my fragile little heart and I are sent to the back of the queue and at the bottom of everyone else's priority lists.
Again - I am not trying to whine, moan and have an oh-woe-is-me session. I just need to get a tiny bit of this out, take a step back and go - ok, this is what we're going to do about it girlfriend.
So, I am going to go back to basics. Find the simple joys in my daily life, children and husband. EVERY. DAY. Looking for and focussing on the happy stuff forces one to always be on the lookout, to consciously seek out what is good and leaves little time to sit in a corner and sulk. What I think about, I begin to say. What I begin to say, I begin to do. What I begin to do, I become.
Onwards and upwards, to infinity and beyond!
Have a happy day :)