Monday 8 September 2014

My Josie

This morning, very unexpectedly, I had to say goodbye to my Josie.  My heart is so utterly crushed and all I could think to do was to write about her.


14 years ago we adopted this little moggie.  She'd been abandoned, and friends of friends had heard we were looking for a cat.  A vet confirmed that she was a year old and likely to have had less then gentle treatment.  Taking her home from Mission Bay where she'd been found, to Northcote, we decided to call her Josie.  Mostly because we'd just watched the terrible "Josie and the Pussycats" movie a few days prior and thought it hilarious.

She was our first baby.  It took months to gain her trust and venture out from under the bed or let us near her.  We got there eventually and soon she was sleeping on our bed and snoozing on our laps.  She never quite warmed to anyone else and always disappeared at the sight or sounds of another human.  People referred to her as our phantom or imaginary cat, as sightings were so rare.  I am allergic to cats but built up an immunity toward her... I was utterly in love with her and determined to be buddies.


She moved all over Auckland with us and never once seemed even close to running away.  She brought us two mice and one bird in all her years and didn't really scrap with other cats.  The biggest thing we did that bothered her was having human babies.  She has up until last night, made a habit of disappearing outside before the kids woke up and would come back in when they were asleep.  Then she would hang out with us, sleep at our feet and occasionally grace visitors with her presence...provided they weren't children.

Over the last couple of days we noticed she wasn't cleaning herself properly, she was dropping her cat biscuits and had her tongue poking out just a wee bit.  Not finding anything immediately wrong and not in any obvious pain we figured she was just getting a bit old.  But then a couple of nights ago, we felt a strange and rather huge bulge all down her jaw, which was very well disguised.  Her eating was obviously a real mission as she was barely getting anything down...we'll take her to the vet next week we decided.  And then last night she came in, all bloodied.  Something was now obviously not right.

So we cleaned her up and cuddled - a bit concerned but not expecting the worst.  This morning I took her to the Vet who said it was a tumor on her jaw.  It had obviously been growing rapidly in the last couple of weeks and was  making eating, swallowing and closing her mouth hard... and also pushing her teeth out and rupturing her gums.  She was not in terrible pain though a bit uncomfortable, but otherwise in great shape for a 15 year old lady.  However, there was nothing we could do and it was only a matter of days before things would go downhill even more quickly.


I cuddled my baby as they put her to sleep.  I am grateful that she is at peace and wont suffer.  I am grateful I got to say goodbye, hold and cuddle her as she went to Heaven.  My heart is heavy - I will miss her coming in the bathroom window while I brush my teeth, purring and slobbering as I pat her, her weight  beside me while I'm sleeping or her face staring at me in the middle of the night, her gorgeous soft fur and her super soft belly.  That she trusted me, and I loved her.

Rest in peace my Josie - I will miss you terribly my Moggie xx

15 comments:

  1. thinking of you beautiful lady as you grieve the loss of such a special part of your life xxx big hugs xxxx

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  2. Oh Leonie! This is just so sad, she is so beautiful and how funny and special that she chose just you to show herself to. It's so hard to say goodbye when they have been in your life for so long. You are right, it is a comfort to know that she won't linger in pain, but that is the only comfort, because I know you would much rather still have her with you. Rest in peace, Josie, you have wonderful parents.

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  3. So sorry to hear that. She sounds like she was a wonderful pet

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  4. Oh Leonie it is so hard saying good bye, she was a beautiful cat that loved you and blessed your life. I have had to do the same thing to many of my beloved pets over the years, it never gets easier. I did however feel when they were unwell and at the end of their days that I could give them one last gift, be the one who says yes to the vet to end their pain and suffering.
    Take carexxx

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  5. Sending lots of love and hugs your way at such a sad time. This was a beautiful tribute to your furry baby, and I shed many tears for you all xxxx

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  6. Aw Leonie. Your Josie looks like she really knew how much she was loved. They come into our lives and we don't expect them to effect us so deeply, but they do. May your memories of her keep you smiling long past the tears xx

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  7. Oh I am so sorry. She looks like she was a really beautiful cat! It is so hard to say bye to a pet xxx

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  8. You had me in tears Leonie, such a sweet tribute. Pets enrich our lives so much, just wish they lasted as long as we do. Will be thinking of you x

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  9. You have me in tears my dear friend. Having been through this earlier this year I can feel your grief through the computer. A gentle hug to you all xxx A very beautiful post

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  10. Gosh, I'm fighting back tears here too. Sorry about your loss. x

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  11. Aw. I cried. That last photo is just beautiful- it's like she's saying, thank you, I know you loved me.

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  12. oh it's so hard to lose a pet, they become such a part of your family. We are still missing our dog. Lots of love to you xoxo

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  13. OH, I'm so sorry to read this. It's hard when we get so attached to the furry members of our family. xx Giant hugs for you. xx

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